words, words, words

"You will never make a good Pastor's wife." she said.
"Why?" I looked at her with a puzzled look.  I didn't know there was a specific formula to being a pastor's wife.
"Well, to begin with, you wear jeans.  A Pastor's wife should never wear jeans, or for that matter, pants!  Second, you do not play the piano!"
I thought to myself, "Is she serious?"

I was newly married, just 21, to a budding pastor, studying in the South.  I thought my biggest worries were going to be having to meet new people!  However, I was quickly finding out that words and expectations of others do a great job of cutting to the quick.  In my younger adult years I am beginning to find that, while the expectations of adults as a child can often cause echoes, the expectations and "rules and regulations" placed on you, (or that you allow others to place on you) can and often do cause echoes that you carry around with you and affect your every day actions.

I did not really realize until later that those simple words of this lady, though well-meaning on her part I am sure, (or maybe not), would cut deeply into me and bother me for years, beyond the "Pastor's wife" aspect of my life.  It was simply a matter of me allowing the words to dig deeply into me and cause me to feel more of the "I am not good enough" to do or be anything.  

You see, the words you use, carelessly or otherwise, have a lasting affect even when you do not know.  God was gracious to me.  I do know I am worth more than "not good enough" and there are many things He has given me the ability to do and to do well.  I am a caring person with artistic talents.  These words echo beside those other words and bare up much better.  I am able, with God' grace to remember positive echoes.  Give some positive echoes.